You may have heard of spiritual direction before and wondered what it is. Is it mentoring? Counseling? Some strange way of submitting yourself to an authority who tells you what to do in your spiritual life?
It’s actually none of those things.
Spiritual direction creates space for you to attend to your relationship with God. That’s it. It’s a dedicated space — usually offered once a month — to reflect on how God has been present to you in your life, or perhaps to consider how God has not been present in the ways you had hoped. It creates a place to notice and talk to God about these things in the presence of someone who can help you notice them and then listen and respond to God.
I’ve been meeting with my spiritual director, Elaine, just shy of five years now, and every month, our hour-long sessions are like breathing fresh, pure air. I have so many memories of leaving her home with a smile on my face and a bounce in my step, deeply encouraged at having encountered God in some new way during our time together. And when life has been especially difficult, I’ve sometimes arrived on her doorstep breathing what felt like my last breath spiritually, needing so much the gift of shared time and space with this person who has come to know me and the terrain of my journey and my relationship with God, who then sits with me in it with wisdom, patience, full acceptance, and love.
Even though I have a faithful prayer life and my faith is an integrated and vibrant part of my daily life, I still meet with my director once a month — and plan to meet with a director each month for the rest of my life! I have found it to be such an invaluable part of my life and connection with God that I cannot imagine going without it
I’d encourage you to consider spiritual direction as a regular part of your life, too. If you are looking for a safe space to talk openly and honestly about your relationship with God but don’t know where to start, you can start with us. Click here to complete our spiritual direction intake form.
Are you familiar with spiritual direction? Have you ever met with a spiritual director? Do you have any questions about spiritual direction that you’d like to ask here?
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Christianne, I’ve sat under the wonderful ministry of a spiritual director in a more “formal” sense now for about 15 years. In every case, it has always delighted and amazed me how appropriate and serendipitous our meetings were. The whole idea of spiritual director solidifies the understanding that God’s voice is heard most clearly and often through others. Now, when I am asked “what is God doing in your life?” I feel a certain responsibility to share that information through the lens of how others have helped me arrive at that very thing. Thanks for your clear recommendation to pursue the same!
Christianne, I appreciate you sharing the importance of spiritual direction in your own life. Your comment “I cannot imagine going without it”… makes me want to ask, how is your life DIFFERENT with being in spiritual direction vs not. What are some key things that stand out for you as a person who meets with a spiritual director vs the days when you did not. I often hear folks say…”People get along fine without spiritual direction…why would it make a difference”? So could you answer that personally from your own experience?
Great questions, Val. This might be something worth exploring in greater depth in a separate blog post, but for now I’ll share these responses off the top of my head:
1. Spiritual direction is a place I tangibly experience the love of God. Especially when I’m struggling with self-judgment, looking down at the floor in shame, I can look up and into the eyes of my spiritual director and see nothing but love, acceptance, and compassion. Through Elaine, I experience God’s gaze on me.
2. Spiritual direction helps me notice things I wouldn’t otherwise notice. I’m a pretty intentional person in my prayer life, and God and I talk to each other through images a lot in prayer, but when I bring those conversations and images to spiritual direction, I’m given the gift of an additional perspective. I can’t count the number of times Elaine has pointed out something to me about a prayer image I’ve shared that I wouldn’t have noticed on my own. It’s like they say: two heads are better than one.
3. Spiritual direction keeps me going and keeps me intentional. Even though my life with God is my top priority, there are certainly seasons — or even just chunks of time in a given month — where I’m avoiding God or avoiding myself. Or there are times when life gets busy so my normal routines of attending to God get all jumbled and out of whack. Going to spiritual direction once a month keeps me tuned in even if everything else in life is going haywire or I’m having a hard time being present.
Yes! I would echo absolutely everything Christianne shares here and add quite simply, time with my SD allows me to vocalize my soul in the presence of someone who understands the soul, generally, and mine, specifically. It’s cathartic at least, conversional at best.