Nothing is more paradoxical it seems than life with God. Gain by losing. Live by dying. Exaltation through humility. Joy through sorrow. Forgiveness through forgiving. Rest through striving to enter rest. What?!
As we enter a new year of struggle and promise and hopes and failures and…our greatest need as we move into a new, possibly challenging, year is…renewal. Newness. A sense of starting over.
For all our best endeavors, clearest callings, and unflagging dedication, renewal can be experienced in only one way – surrender. Sometimes it eludes us because we tie it too closely to our spiritual practice. Or perhaps we’ve fallen into the misapprehension that those practices, in themselves, will automatically bring the renewal we so need.
Hence, the greatest obstacle to our own spiritual nourishment can be…our pursuit of spiritual nourishment! To pursue rest as its own end is like pursuing a lover for the thrill of the pursuit. It turns the object of our affection into just that, an object. A toy. An idol. They become the tissue that catches the delightful sneeze only to be then unceremoniously tossed away.
The spiritual life is an ongoing exercise in giving up to the stronger gravitas of grace and giving in to the deeper work of God. Both are moving at levels of our existence well beyond our simple radar. It assumes that God is already at work, pursuing us like an infinite lover who will not stay ignored for long. God is in constant pursuit of our deepest selves so that God can introduce us…to our deepest selves!
The renewal that comes from rest is something ever available but which is, ultimately, sheer gift from heaven. As soon as we are willing to relieve ourselves of the need to see God in terms of desperation and rescue and agree to broaden our understanding to include God as romantic pursuer, we have only to extend the inner arms of our spirits, close our eyes and say, “yes.” Then, the work of God, already underway, can sweep us up into places we never thought possible. The Spirit subtlely nourishes our desert-spirits in sacred pursuit, a subversive subterfuge of sweet serenity.
Almost every great mystic has understood this valuable truth. The Desert Abbas and Ammas recognized the paradoxical relationship between our dogged pursuit of spiritual renewal and the need to surrender that same pursuit into the hands of the Great Other with whom we have to do. Abba Pior made the following observation over sixteen hundred years ago which still holds true today, “Abba Poemen said about Abba Pior that every single day he made a fresh beginning.
We forge into each day like it is the very first one and possibly our last one. But, the spiritual irony is that we seek to slake our thirst from the water of life that always leaves us thirsty still. We exercise our soulish muscles in order to find rest for our souls. We wrestle ourselves that we might be at peace with ourselves. We chase after our own need to stop the chase!
At the end of it all, we engage God in any way we can, never once looking away from the possibility of receiving that which only God gives, regardless of our engagement. What do we gain from this spiritual cat and mouse game?
Everything.
“So then, a sabbath rest still remains for the people of God; for those who enter God’s rest also cease from their labours as God did from his. Let us therefore make every effort to enter that rest…”
Pictures found here and here, respectively
Robert Alan Rife
Latest posts by Robert Alan Rife (see all)
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The newest Mars Hill Audio has an interview with Steven Boyer about his new book (with Chris Hall) about how fundamental Christianity is afraid of mystery. If their theologians can’t explain it, then somehow God really isn’t know-able, a real heresy to that crowd. It is a fine line and you point that out well in this essay. Thanks.
If God and the gospel are too quickly demystified and explained, then something other than the biblical God and the gospel are under scrutiny.
Rob, I think you articulate well here the notion of “beginners mind” that Rohr develops (from Shunryu Zuzuki) in Everything Belongs. It requires of us this constant return to awareness, doesn’t it; to the present moment; to gratitude for what is. It is paradoxical somehow–a simultaneous going inward while looking intensely outward; aware of self enough to let go of self.
We cannot give away what we do not possess. The point, to a large degree, of the spiritual life is awakening to what is, to the truest me, the truest universe, the true God of Mystery and Truth. It is why whenever we give ourselves away, we are replenished exponentially. We are eternal springs of life-giving water that tastes best when offered to other thirsty souls. But all of this is pure gift. Our rest and renewal are necessity, our deepest efforts, but God’s gift, even in spite of ourselves.
HOW TRUE MIGHT BE FOR ALL OF US AT DIFFERENT STAGES IN OUR LIVES!
Ian, you make a good point. Stages of life are critical. We need to let each stage ….happen. A fun topic might be what Rob is talking about only as understood in the various psychological and spiritual stages of development.
Great post Rob, but all I can see is the naked man. LOL No, it’s seriously good. Your light heartedness with deep spiritual truths is refreshing and much needed. And it is like beginner’s mind, but more, much more. As we enter into the journey of surrender and entering into our rest in God. We live from that position of rest, in God’s finished work in Christ, and our renewal grows like the vineyard. But not just our renewal, but the restoration of all things. Thanks Rob for touching our hearts with heaven.
Bob, it’s been so refreshing getting to know others like yourself who love to share this journey of discovery in Christ. You have such a broadly ecumenical, deeply loving but solidly Christ-centered Gospel love that is fetching. When we join our voices together, let’s pray that others can drink of something there that has in fact slaked our own spiritual thirst. Peace, brother.
Great post, Rob… the idea of God as a romantic pursuer is one that I’ve given most of my study too in recent years. The thought that we can be so secure in God’s presence as to stand on the mountain tops calling on the winds of life to blow upon us as we are secure enough to know… to know… that nothing can separate us from Love.
Thanks, Chadwick. I don’t call myself a Calvinist at all. However, the Reformed Tradition, compassionately interpreted, allows for a very busy, active, pursuer God who doesn’t wait for our poor, half-hearted responses. God is running after us long before we even know we need the chase to begin with!
Chadwick, I hear you. How hard it must be for men to be “chased by God”. Culturally men are busy chasing their job, rescuing beauties or they are dead. I long to see men be chased by God and I long for women to give more voice to their experiences of what they culturally began to sense at young ages..(but have not had places to voice it). But then again, this is a whole other lonnnnnng, topic.
Rob, you hit a nail on what I think makes “Christians” and churches unfruitful. Many of us say its the need for mystery(true). But if we don’t let go into mystery, how would we know mystery? This is why we need people like Rohr and others (mentioned in the above) to help us live in the world of both/and. Kingdom in a mustard seed, keeping and breaking the Sabbath, dying and rising, healing and suffering. These are great examples that help us live as mere humans who need to learn ourselves into the fierce whisper of Cosmic Love. As St Bernard of Clairvaux would see it, life is about learning to love ourselves (we all know this is the hardest task). To me, that is pure grace. Grace in our sin and grace in our good. In the spirit of the great message you give here, we must let go of the ways we clutch ourselves to any one side of anything (Mind you, that includes evil or good). To me the churches that get themselves into the biggest theological quicksand are those who veer toward one clutching or the other. Living into the paradoxes has been my greatest path of transformation. Of course Nouwen said the same thing, as Wil wrote in one of his books. So many good thoughts here Rob.
“…the fierce whisper of Cosmic Love.” Val, I should have had you write this post! That’s just gorgeous. When God woos us, romances us, doggedly pursues us, God does so in spite of our best efforts. Even in the face of our pathological faithlessness, fear and even apathy, the God who will not be ignored (since ignoring God is never to our own benefit), storms the gates of our deepest darkness, hottest anger, leanest faith and laziest spiritual practice and still chooses to dispense grace. It is now and forever shall be the greatest, most transforming mystery. Soli deo Gloria.